Interview By Mary Mckeone

There is a deep generosity about Lorraine Stanton which has always been my experience of her. We are speaking on the phone, late one evening, and she is telling me about her journey with Insight which started as long ago as 1989. She had just left a violent marriage and finding herself living back at her Mum’s, with two young children and no job, life was not easy. So, when a friend, who had done Insight I, offered to pay for her to do the seminar, she accepted. It was, she says, now in retrospect, “the shock of my life.”  But at the time, she was a resistant participant and laughs at the memory of how upset and indignant she was that Friday evening, waiting outside for the seminar doors to open. Looking back, she recognises how entrenched she was in victim consciousness, how her self-worth was non-existent.  And yet, something that evening provoked her into sharing. She shared how it was all well and good for others, but Insight would not work for her. She doesn’t remember what else she said but she does remember clearly, how the facilitator:

“in an insightful and incisive way dismantled every argument I put forward. He managed to suspend my belief system for long enough for me to transform from a powerless victim [of circumstance] to a fountain of possibility.”

That evening was a springboard for the rest of the training, and it would seem, the rest of her life.

 

She was hooked. Realising she had choices gave her a newfound power which, she says:

“was like the lid taken off a volcano. I was supercharged. Insight I, opened my eyes, opened my heart and the energy and life that came up was uncontrolled. It was, as if, there was no off button.”

It took until Insight II, which she did the following year, for her to really take charge

of that power. By allowing all of life to exist, (both the wonderful and the not so great,) she found she came more into balance, her understanding of life deepened, as did her relationships and connections. With each seminar she participated in, audited, or assisted on, she was more grounded, more aware.

 

But it was Insight IV that brought her the greatest gifts. A twenty-nine day seminar, which she took in Los Angeles, Lorraine remembers very little about the seminar itself. What she remembers and where the real lessons for her were, was in getting there. If she was to do the seminar she needed to pay for flights, accommodation, and tuition fees and with her kids still young, and no job or money to speak of, she knew she had a challenge on her hands. She would need to raise £5000, (almost £10,000 in today’s money.) A natural giver, Lorraine now found herself asking others to give to her. She decided if 5000 people donated £1, she would have the money to go. With that as her goal, she asked family. She asked friends. She asked people on the street. She asked people in seminars. She asked people in the post office and what she found was:

“an incredible outpouring of love and support for me. Many people said, ‘no,’ but others gave £5 or more.”

Friends started collection jars for her, some did sponsored walks and others sponsored activities but still without her deposit, she rang the Los Angeles Insight Office to register her intention to do the seminar and to ask if they would hold her a place. They agreed and when she asked if they would give a discount on her tuition fees, they said she could pay half. This incredible flow of abundance didn’t end there. Her mum agreed to look after her children. A friend, who also decided to do Insight IV, invited Lorraine to share her accommodation free of charge, whilst another friend paid for her flights. It was Lorraine says:

“An important lesson of standing in my truth, without attachment, asking will my Universe support me.”

But for this woman, who instinctively was an over-giver, receiving such a flow of abundance did not, at first, sit easily. Grateful for all the kindness shown, she found the more she received, the more her sense of worthiness was challenged, which was uncomfortable. But this discomfort proved, also, to be a gift. She began to better understand the cycle of abundance and how the more we learn to receive, the more able we are to give.

“My receiving,” she says, “is not just about others giving [to me,] but how deeply I receive from myself: my own breath, my own presence, my own abundance.”   

 

Finding ourselves in a position of need can leave us feeling vulnerable and full of self-doubt. Lorraine understands this. She, also, understands that from time to time we all get a chance to be on both sides of the exchange and that on a deeper level, giving and receiving are companion energies.

“One of the most important and valuable lessons of my life is that I learnt how in the gift of receiving, there is also a gift of giving. When you deeply receive, a gift arises from the depth of that receiving. The gift that arises is automatically given, which may or may not be received by the other person. But it is deeply touching when we can connect and sharing our love and appreciation receive [the gift] and then give it back.’ 

 

That Lorraine has lived by these principles is very much an evidence through her devotion to Insight. For most of the last thirty years, she has given so much to the organisation. She has managed and trained volunteers in many different roles and shared her skills and expertise in a variety of loving ways. But this doting grandmother who recently turned sixty and who is a pillar of inspiration and generosity has one more thing to add on what giving and receiving means to her:

“Life has a way of working itself out and it is my job to stay in open flow, to keep my mind open allowing the flow of abundance to manifest fully.”

Such deep knowing along with a profound gratitude for all she has received is, I believe, why she can give with such open-hearted generosity.

 

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